The Madd House

As a square peg in a round hole I found it difficult to make friends as a kid. Other children found my weirdness, my outspokenness and my non-conformity disconcerting and avoided me as a result. As I’ve aged and come to know and accept my self more I’ve sought out other folk with a similar mindset. “Soort soek soort”, as they say. But as you can imagine having a “best” friend was nigh on impossible. No-one wanted to get that close to me! Grin! In fact, I can almost count my best friends in life on one hand – but five of them stand out in a big way. Here’s my story: My first best friend was a girl who had been in my class since Grade 1. We appeared to have quite a lot in common and played together at break times. When I was old enough I was allowed to go on play dates to her house after school on a Friday. By the time I was 9 my Mom let me go on sleepovers to her house. That’s where the trouble started. She made me participate in things that made me feel so uncomfortable

“Misery loves company” so the saying goes, but I’d like to explore a different angle of misery. I know a (fortunately small) handful of people who seem to revel in misery. They enjoy being depressed, they enjoy it when things go badly for them and I would go so far as to say that they attract bad circumstances to themselves just so that they can be grumpy. Now this way of thinking I just don’t understand. If anything, I tend to be on the opposite end of the spectrum and, being eternally optimistic, I tend to find the positive in bad situations and I hate being depressed. I will make every effort to wend my way out of the doldrums, no matter how long it takes. Now I know that I can’t expect everyone I meet to have a sunny disposition. But I just don’t get the concept of enjoying being miserable. One of my friends will say something positive probably about one time in one hundred. And she’s a nice lady: intelligent, very pretty, has a well paying job but she just finds the negative i

Once upon a time there was a young boy called Tom. Thomas James Gettysburg – he liked to think of himself. That sounded like a grand and regal name. But he was just Tom. Tom Nel. Tom lived with his mom, Sally. Life wasn’t always easy. Sally had lots of boyfriends and sometimes she left Tom alone for a few days. He didn’t mind. He was quite capable of looking after himself and getting himself to and from school. He quite liked school. Not all the subjects, mind you, but he did ok. Tom’s dad, Steve, lived in another town so Tom didn’t see him very often. Once every few months Steve and his girlfriend, Barbie, came to visit Tom’s uncle Kevin on his farm. Tom’s mom would drop him off at his uncle Kevin and they would all spend the weekend together at the farm. Tom liked those weekends. There was always food to eat and sometimes treats, like biltong. Tom wasn’t allowed the treats. But he knew that if he waited long enough, the adults would drink too much beer, act funny, yell and figh

My neighbour and I are there for each other. It’s just how we roll. Little favours here and there, shared food when we buy in bulk, pet sitting and loving, kiddie sitting, advice, gossip etc etc etc. One morning early last week she realised that she’d locked her housekeeper out of the house and because she was already at work and I was still at home it made sense that I would go and let the housekeeper into the house. I grabbed my set of keys for next door and headed down to my gate – our gates are right next to one another. Sure enough, there stood Eunice. I greeted her and opened the gate a short way (so that the doggies wouldn’t run out) and then closed it again behind us. I then let Eunice into the house and returned to the gate. It wouldn’t open. The light on the remote control came on. But the motor didn’t even click or beep or anything. Damn! I didn’t have my cell phone. I looked hopefully over the wall towards my house in case anyone was looking out, but no such luck. I s

If you’re a parent, and more specifically a Mom, you will know that feeling of slightly decadent relief when you are able to catch a few seconds away from the maddening crowd when nature calls and you close the door behind you shutting out the chaos. Ah peace. You will also know that feeling of desperation when a little body “finds” you and, in a moment of awesome self-belief and true heroism saves you from your loneliness by perching on the edge of the bath and weaving endless stories into the air of the once wonderfully tranquil bathroom. Or a dog pushes the door open and with sagging eyes filled with despair demands some love. Now. Before I expire. It is out of the necessity of really needing to park off and just exist without having to think or do or listen or talk or imagine that I commenced with the tradition of “stealing” my me time early in the morning, before I wake the family and the doggies and the birdies, before the day hums loudly with life. So most mornings will find

Mondays! I love them! Genuinely. A chance to start a new week, a new adventure, to try again. And this particular one happened to be the first Monday back at work after a month’s holiday. Not only a new day and new week but a new year!! Yay! But this Monday had it in for me, or possibly had decided to try and knock me off my smile. Started quite early too. For some insane reason I couldn’t fit Jerry’s bicycle into my car – it’s fitted before, many times – but today it wouldn’t, for love or money, fit into the little yellow dragon. Then my Gorgeous Séan wore a very puzzled look on his beak whilst asking what time I expect to return home. I patiently explained that I finish work at 16h45 to which he exclaimed in astonishment “Oh, I didn’t know you were going back to work today, I thought you were still on leave!!!” Hmmmm - ♫♪♫ I talk to the trees ♪♫♪ ’cos at least they listen sometimes ...... After having dropped Jerry at her play date things were going quite smoothly until, upon arr

Tuesday saw Jerry and I heading off to watch Sleeping Beauty on Ice by the Imperial Ice Stars. What a spectacular performance!!! Séan didn’t want to come with because of having been dragged to similar events quite often as a kidlet (what an awesome Mom he had!!! Sjoe!). So the night started off with us arriving at the Teatro at Monte Casino with a giant bag of Woolies Chuckles shoved into my handbag (they’re very yummy but cost about the same as a small left bollock, so we only buy them as absolute treat ....... like for the theatre). Jerry was a little indignant that the pint sized usher suggested she take a “kiddies cushion” for extra height but my well mannered ten year old smiled down at the little round woman and graciously accepted her large square pillow. Once we’d apologised our way past the early birds and gotten ourselves seated we marvelled at the splendiferous set ..... painted creepers containing real silk roses and a root that looked just like a sleeping lion. Wo

Wow! Time sure flies when you’re having fun. Here we are well entrenched in 2014 and I find myself with only one week of leave left. Ouch! ‘s all good though, I truly enjoy my job and I am well rested and looking forward to see what grade 5 (through the eyes of Jerry) brings. 2013 was a bit of a black and white year. A year of extreme highs and extreme lows – no grey – no middle ground. Two people whom I love and who both had very little chance of becoming parents arrived at the end of the year being a Mom (in the case of my sister) and a Dad (in the case of my second cousin). Wonderful! Heather (sister) was asked to provide a safe house for a 2 month old baby who was being badly neglected. Said baby is now officially being fostered by Heather (with adoption on the cards) and has crept and crawled into our hearts. And she even gave a special prezzie to Heather on Heather’s birthday yesterday: her first tooth poking gleefully through her gum. Jacques (cousin) was hardly